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Archive for April 2008
burgers
April 28, 2008 by j.
The first several posts for The Greatest DC Burger hunt are at long last posted. Please see the burger link above!
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waxed
April 22, 2008 by j.
I got a phone call this evening.. my mom, hysterically sobbing because she had a beautician go bananas on her and wax off too much of her eyebrows. If you’ve ever seen or heard your parents cry, then you know how traumatic this was for me!! 
She had me fairly convinced that this demon waxologist had accidentally and enthusiastically ripped off half of her face with duct tape. I hurriedly packed up every makeup product that I own and rushed to her house, practicing speeches in my head about how having a bald face is the newest Hollywood trend and if Mona Lisa can pull it off then it can’t be that bad, et cetera et cetera. I get home expecting to find Boy George, and here is my poor wailing mother…
She looks *exactly* the same to me.
Either I’m not very observant, or I’m genetically doomed to a lifetime of incurable vanity.
PS - For this post, I looked around on the web for images of browless people, and found a lot of pictures of folks who have alopecia (which I’m not about to make fun of). I did also curiously come across many photos of Whoopi Goldberg - I wasn’t aware that she has no eyebrows, but there are lots of folks on the internet that feel it’s worth pointing out. Not sure what’s going on in this photo but as you can see, they are all correct - no brows!
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eva
April 20, 2008 by j.
Nee 3.19.2008 3:04pm
7 lbs 9 oz
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thumbs
April 17, 2008 by j.
I found a set of books this evening from a while back, when I was teaching myself sign language. (I stopped learning it because the guy I was dating made me feel foolish for wanting to learn it.. my actual foolish decision was staying with him!) This got me to thinking.. for a deaf person, your hands are so important for communicating right? What if you were born without thumbs? Would that be the signer’s equivalent to speaking with a lisp? Or would you not be able to communicate at all? I suppose if you had no thumbs, a bigger problem would be that you wouldn’t be able to open jars or grasp a pencil…
Ah, the deep thoughts of spring! 
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squat
April 17, 2008 by j.
You know it’s a nice day out when just about everyone loses their head.
Kev, clinging to the side of a moving pickup truck: Ooooo! It’s like the squat team!
Tim, driving the moving pickup truck: The who?
Kev: The Squat Team. You know, THE SQUAT TEAM!!!
Tim: ….do you mean the SWAT team??
*sounds of screaming laughter and wailing children*
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magic cookies
April 15, 2008 by j.
Last summer when I turned 29, I had a nice dinner with my family. My fortune cookie hilariously looked like this:
Last weekend, I had lunch with my folks, and my fortune cookie looked like this:
Uncanny, no? On a related note.. my dad’s fortune cookie read “girlfriend” in the same manner. Which was hilarious for everyone except my mom.
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mark
April 10, 2008 by j.
All of us get lost in the darkness, dreamers learn to steer by the stars.
- Rush, The Pass -
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